It looks as though I will go through the weekend without cooking. Today I have lunch with friends - one of which has a birthday - and tomorrow I have lunch with two daughters, two mothers and one grandmother. That makes five excluding me. I am going to be the odd one out in a Mother's Day celebration.
It looks as though there is a big rugby game here today. A part of me resents Bath Rugby for taking over the middle of town on a piece of land which was privately bequeathed 'to the people of Bath'.
They have a somewhat run-down stadium and hospitality buildings on the Recreation Ground (the clue is in the name), but they have just obtained permission to build a massive £30 million stadium which will replace the seating stands which are taken down at the end of every season so that the people of Bath can use the space for whatever recreation they want - usually dog-walking.
Ever since rugby turned professional, more and more money has been poured into it, meaning that the only people who can afford to be chairmen are seriously rich. It has turned into a business and the business is taking a few liberties with the people of Bath.
It can get away with it because rugby brings quite a lot of revenue into the city - all those people eat and drink when here and help the businesses pay their enormous rent and rates. Bath is a comparatively rich council I believe. A few years ago, the Roman Baths were second only to the Tower of London in terms of visitor numbers.
There is no money for amateur sport, so we might as well let Bath Rugby take over the public space. You will have to walk your dog somewhere else.
I was all set to look on the bright side this cold, crisp and sunny morning when I heard Jan Morris saying that Britain was irretrievably going down the toilet. Well, the words were more like, 'Britain has diminished itself in the esteem of the rest of the world'. Now I feel like an international juvenile delinquent again. Still, I mustn't dwell on it. As you all said yesterday, there seems to be nothing we can do about it except change our attitudes or just take the punishment like men.
In any case, my job does not exactly change the world. Example: Today I am making a pair of rabbit's ears. That's going to have a massive impact on world peace and global harmony, eh?
Another example: A British university research laboratory recently produced a paper showing the effects of underpants on farts. The head of the team said, "Ok, it's not rocket-science but nobody has done this before."
Another example: The table lamp above could be yours for £150.
Trump has come up with another brilliant idea: Give all U.S. schools guns and make 20% of the teachers carry them so they can have shoot-outs with armed intruders in the corridors and classrooms. That will solve the problem. He is not just an idiot, he is a very unpleasant idiot, and that is me being polite.
I have almost given up listening to the news these days, because of Trump, Brexit and Syria, but I think it is our duty to know what is happening in Syria whilst the U.N. and NATO stand by and watch women and children being massacred in their homes by Russian-backed forces. At least 350 have been killed and thousands injured during a few days and nights in one small corner of a place which has been under siege for ages. They are being shelled by Assad day and night, and nobody dares to stop it for fear of upsetting Putin.
Today, there will be a prolonged emergency Cabinet meeting at Chequers with Teresa May making a last-ditch attempt to unify her government so that they can begin making real decisions on what to do about the few thousand alterations to policies which need hard legislation within about 3 months - or else. Or else what? We don't know. That is the whole point. It is the uncertainty which is undermining British business.
The Port of Rotterdam is recruiting hundreds of extra Customs officers in the belief that it is all going to fall apart and Britain will impose hard borders all over the place. The Head of Customs in Holland says he cannot see it going any other way, but trade is trade and one way or another it will carry on. Better to spend money now and make more in the future.
What is the worst scenario for you? Theresa May calls a snap election and Jeremy Corbyn gets in?
I really lost my rag with the technician last night. All he was supposed to do was put the thing up on You Tube - something I could have done myself - but he considered that the dark screen at the beginning lasted too long (despite that the music begins quite soon) and clipped so much off it that he also clipped the opening of the music off it at the same time.
Having spent quite a bit of my own money getting it edited by a professional, you can imagine what I thought about the techie's ham-fisted attempts at improving it. I told him what I thought via SMS and insisted that he restore it to the original immediately. He tried to justify his uncalled-for edit and I told him again that it was a fuck-up which ruined the beginning of the thing. He told me to fuck off and I told him that rather than swearing at me, he should fuck off and restore the original.
So he went back to YouTube, took his version down, then put the original back up - with a different address.
Ok, I know it is just an average little music video which will be forgotten by next week, but I really didn't want this half-hearted launch to go off half-cock. The whole thing is embarrassing enough as it is.
At last. I can now give you the definitive reason why we all write blogs.
A neuroscientist told us today (without going into the biology) that when we share information or opinions with others, it releases dopamine into our system and makes us feel good. There have been surveys done in which people were actually willing to pay money to share their opinions or preferences over, say, tea and coffee.
The theory behind this is that we are rewarded with a little dopamine hit to encourage us to share information or advice on best practice in order to further the human race. That's where the biological bit comes in.
So when we say we are 'addicted' to blogging, we are not exaggerating. Apparently Twitter is the ideal format which gives us the most hits in the shortest possible time, which explains why Donald Trump is so keen on sharing his opinions about 20 times a day, 7 days a week.
And I thought that I was altruistically giving you all the benefit of my opinions and wisdom. Now I feel unclean.